Stop Chasing…if when, why and how?

Photo by Austin Chan on Unsplash

How do we stop the chase? We start it almost from birth. We are motivated to chase development as we enter this world, benchmarked against other babies, toddlers and children until our physicality has reached its peak. The chase then changes lanes to the mental capacity of knowledge as we learn and are tested via “standardized” benchmarks to determine where we sit amongst the pack and which then determines where we head to next; job, tech school, or college. For what? All to steep us for the chase that will begin when standing on our own two feet. The chase to be like others our age or better and long for what others want; regardless of our ability or means. 

This dreadmill of the chase goes on for years; through our twenties, thirties, and into our forties before we are faced with fifty. To most, we hope that it is midlife, but we cannot know. We look at where we are in this moment after 50 years of chasing and find ourselves stopped, facing our new reality and wondering what is next and worse than wondering is why we should, could, or would do anything more.

This leaves us pondering the state of being versus doing. After all, once you consider stopping the chase there is no more doing. So where does that leave us? To be or not to be…that is the next question! The chase exhausts us yet when we stop we do not recover we reconsider. We feel guilty for not chasing. We feel lost on a path so worn that the path is now a hole we have dug ourselves into and you cannot chase if you don’t climb, if you don’t climb does this become the end? 

The real deal is that we spend so many years chasing, climbing ladders, and proving the ground we stand on that when it is time to stop and enjoy the view we can’t see straight. At what point have we put in the time to be absolved of the work and enjoy the reward. There is no sign that appears that says you have now “Arrived”. Arrival is where the chase ends.

Ironic as it may be the chase ends at the start line of a new beginning. It does not require training because the work has been done and now the cruise control can be “set”. The funny thing about cruising is that it does not require anything more than what you have already learned and now have the resources to do; which is to be. You don’t apply the gas and yet you don’t put on the brakes. You cruise. 

So here we sit, those of us at the FINISH LINE of a race well done, trained for, and accomplished. We may have a few medals around our neck even if just for participation. Now is the time to sit back and relish in the reward of all that was accomplished along the way. The learnings, the failures, and most of all the wins only made greater by the embellishment of storytelling. For here is where wisdom begins. We have earned the right of wisdom by stopping the chase. Regardless of the lessons learned, wisdom is all of ours to share for at this point in life there are no benchmarks, tests, or ladders to climb. 

Stop the damn chase. Time to cruise. 

  • When? Now
  • Why? Because you earned it
  • How? Just BE.

Life as I live it — L.

Seeking Normal – Day 10

Day 10 prompt:

Is crisis normal for you? Are you creating crisis in your own life? In the lives of others? Are others creating crisis in your life?

How do you begin to change that?

My answer:

Crisis is not normal for me. I am someone that has anxiety without crisis so to feed into it is counterproductive. When crisis hits in my life I find myself swimming deep in it. This is not a negative but more of an aggressive approach to dealing in it. I can handle crisis better than others as I naturally organize and use my resources optimally.

I do not create crisis in my own life nor in the lives of others. I am actually accused of solving for others; before they even know they need a solve. Again I think that is likely because of my fortitude. I have been through more “than the average bear” and have had to find resources to get where I am mentally and physically and therefore I want to pass that on to those that are standing on that START LINE where I have made it through.

On the last question, this is where I have the most to contribute. Yes, others try to create crisis in my life but the difference is that I no longer allow it. I have been tolerant for many reasons for too many years and I have finally gotten to a point in my life that I simply will not allow it. If I don’t want it then I am not going to tolerate it, not for the sake of anyone or anything. It’s a decision; everything is!

This is a great prompt for our days of COVID-19 because it has caused crisis. It is life or death, it is the most legit crisis we have ever known and I hope will ever know. How you deal with it, how you survive it will be your story, the memory of a time gone by that you will recount for years to come.

Imagine – L.